the love that helped me choose myself

Last weekend, I married the love of my life. And as I sit here reflecting on that day, I can’t help but think about the version of me who once believed she would never have this.

For a long time, I didn’t think love could feel safe. I had spent years in an emotionally and mentally abusive relationship, told I was unworthy, unlovable, and not enough. I carried those words with me, letting them shape what I thought I deserved. I stayed small. I settled. I accepted less than I wanted because I didn’t believe better was possible for me.

And then, I met Karl.

Before I had fully chosen myself, before I had done all the deep healing, before I truly believed I deserved more, he saw me. He saw past the hurt, past the self-doubt, past the walls I had built to protect myself. And instead of trying to fix or save me, he encouraged me to choose myself. To believe that I was worthy of more. To see that the way I had been treated in the past was not a reflection of my worth.

Loving Karl has been the safest thing I have ever done, but what makes our love so strong is that he never asked me to rely on him for my healing. Instead, he held space while I did the work. He reminded me of my worth until I could see it for myself. He supported me as I untangled the old stories and found my own way forward.

And now, here we are. Married. Building a life together that is filled with love, respect, safety, and joy, all things I once thought I would never have.

As I looked around the room on our wedding day, surrounded by people who love and support us, I felt something I never thought I would... peace. The kind of peace that comes from knowing I am exactly where I am meant to be. The kind of peace that comes from choosing myself, over and over again, until I finally built a life that feels like home.

And if you’re reading this and you’re in a place that feels heavy, I need you to know something... this life is possible for you too.

I know what it’s like to feel stuck, to believe that things will never get better, to wonder if love, safety, and happiness are meant for everyone but you. But I promise you, they are.

The life you dream of, the love you deserve, the peace you crave, it’s all waiting for you. And while it might not happen overnight, the first step is allowing yourself to believe that something more is possible. To take the tiniest step towards yourself. To choose even the smallest moment of self-love today.

You are not too broken. You are not too far gone. You are worthy of more than just surviving, you are worthy of thriving.

I didn’t think I’d make it here. And yet, here I am. And I know, deep in my soul, that one day, you will be too.

With love & support,

Shorina | Mindful Soul Collective

Holistic Counsellor, Wellbeing Coach & Business Mentor

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