i broke down and said 'what if i'm just broken?'

I still remember the moment I broke down in front of my counsellor, tears falling faster than I could catch them, my voice cracking as I said, "What if I’m just broken?"

I wasn’t asking for reassurance. I wasn’t looking for someone to tell me I was okay. I genuinely believed it. That something inside me was too shattered to ever be whole again. That no matter how much I tried to heal, I would always be carrying this heaviness, always be struggling to feel normal, always be trying to put myself back together.

I will never forget the way he looked at me... soft, knowing, unwavering. He responded, “you’re not broken, you’re healing.”

And in that moment, something shifted.

Because for so long, I thought my pain was proof that something was wrong with me. I thought the moments I felt triggered, the times I found myself back in old patterns, the days when my emotions felt too heavy to hold meant that I was failing. But that’s not what healing looks like. Healing isn’t neat. It isn’t linear. It isn’t about never struggling again. It’s about learning how to hold yourself through the struggle, how to meet yourself with love instead of shame, how to soften instead of shut down.

That day, I stopped seeing myself as something that needed to be fixed and started seeing myself as someone who deserved to be held.

And if you’ve ever had that moment too, where you’ve wondered if you’re too much, too damaged, too far gone, I need you to know this… you are not broken. You are healing. And healing doesn’t always feel like progress. Sometimes, it feels like unraveling. Sometimes, it feels like falling apart. But every time you choose to keep going, every time you show up for yourself, every time you take one more breath, you are moving forward.

One day, you will look back and realise you are no longer the person who once believed they were broken. You are someone new. Someone softer. Someone stronger. Someone who made it through.

With love & support,

Shorina | Mindful Soul Collective

Holistic Counsellor, Wellbeing Coach & Business Mentor

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